A year ago, I found myself on the couch paralyzed. I felt lost, hopeless and frustrated with where my career was heading. I had no clue what my true purpose and passion was. I had no confidence in myself or my abilities. At the time, I was commuting four hours a day to San Francisco for my full-time tech job and planning weddings as a side hustle. Every moment of my day was consumed by doing things for others whether it was for my co-workers, clients or my family.
I had stopped taking care of myself and wasn't connecting to how I felt. That day all my emotions hit me like a ton of bricks, and I found myself paralyzed on the couch. I had stopped listening to myself and completely forgotten how to connect to my inner voice and intuition. I was keeping myself so busy that I never took the time to stop and check-in with myself. I was also seeking outside validation instead of my own.
As I laid there on my couch and searched my streaming options on the TV to numb my thoughts, I stumbled upon a Rachel Hollis' documentary about her Rise conference. I did not want to hear a pep talk about how I needed to change my life, but something inside me pushed me to click and watch. For the first exercise, she had the crowd write a letter from their perseverance. As I mentioned, I did not want to get off the couch for any circumstance, but there I was again with an inner voice summoning me to grab a notebook and a pen. I did the exercise and wrote down all the things I've done in my life that I was proud of, all the things in my life that I thought were so hard, but I persevered. As I read this letter back to myself, tears streaming down my face, I realized how out of tune I was with myself. I had been talking to myself so severely and stacking negative points one on top another until I believed every word I told myself. My outside life was a reflection of my inner world. I knew then and there that if I wanted my circumstances to change, I had to change my inner turmoil to inner triumph.
Little by little, I started to make small and significant changes in my life. The two changes that had the most impact on my life were:
Journaling | I hadn't written in a journal since high school, and I had forgotten how much I enjoyed it. This practice also forced me to slow down for a daily check-in with myself and set my intention for the day.
Meditation | Encouraged me to be aware, kind and compassionate with myself. The practice of meditation taught me that my inner words have a crucial impact on my outer reality.
Over time, my journaling and meditation practices have evolved. Little by little, I became more comfortable with these activities so that now they are a non-negotiable for me. I need to do them every single day to feel my best. I make sure I start my day this way so that I can set my intentions.
Today I look back at the person I was a year ago, and I'm so proud of myself for taking that first step and becoming aware of what needed to change. I'm delighted with who I am today and continue to strive to be the best version of myself day after day. I sit here finding myself unemployed in these crazy times, the old version of me would have found every negative story and stacked it one on top of another, dragging me down further. The new version of me sees this as happening FOR me not to me. This unique circumstance is forcing me to get resourceful and creative. I'm choosing to be excited by my possibilities rather than fearful of everything that can go wrong.
If you find yourself in a similar negative self-talk pattern I encourage you to slow down, connect with yourself, be kind to yourself and little by little you will find yourself in a brand new state of mind. You will start living a life that you want, not complaining about the life that's happening to you. You are the writer, actor, director of your own life. What do you want that story to look like? For me, I want to look back and see that I overcame obstacles, fears and created the most beautiful life possible for my family and me.
You've saved a few bridal dresses to a Pinterest board. Your friends and family bought you a few wedding magazines which you have dogged eared pages of potential wedding day looks. Now you feel like you have a general idea of your dream dress. We can't tell you how many of our clients have said "I thought I wanted lace but when I tried on that style it wasn't me" or "I wanted a big poofy princess dress, but when I had it on in the shop I thought I wouldn't be able to sit down". Our biggest advice is to try on many different styles even if you don't think its what you want, and you might surprise yourself! We've rounded up our top 5 tips for finding the prefect wedding dress.
When to Buy
The dress should be one of your first purchases when planning a wedding. We recommend starting your search 12 to 9 months before your big day. These gowns are typically custom made and made to order. Once your gown arrives, it might need alterations. Usually, you'll have two to four fittings depending on what alternations you need or want.
Make sure you have a budget in mind. Call around to different bridal boutiques and make sure they carry dresses in your price range. Falling in love with a $10,000 dress when your budget is $1,500 is not a good way to start your big day gown search.
Your Body Type
When looking for a dress search for styles that will flatter and accentuate your best features. You should also try on different cuts to see what you are most comfortable with, and you might surprise yourself and choose something completely different than you initially thought you would.
Dress for the Season
Are you having a summer wedding outdoors in 80 degree heat? Then you might want a light and breathable gown with short sleeves. Having a winter wedding in Tahoe? A heavier fabric dress with sleeves might be more suitable. Weigh out your options and comfort level when choosing your dress.
Who to Bring
Who do you want by your side when trying on wedding dresses? Everyone is different, some brides bring both their parents while others have their bridesmaids. The choice is 1000% yours. We do recommend bringing people who will make the experience fun, memorable and give you advice in a nice way!
A Few of Our Favorite Bridal Gown Shops
Bride to Be Couture - Carmichael, CA
The Bridal Vault - Jamestown, CA
Grace Loves Lace - Los Angeles, CA
Lovely Bride - San Francisco, CA
Wilde Bride - San Francisco, CA
Remember at the end of the day picking your dress is about how YOU feel and what YOU like. You'll want to feel your best and be comfortable on your wedding day. Like Marie Kondo would say "Does this dress spark joy?"
Let us know if you have additional tips or share your favorite bridal dress shop.
Until next time lovelies!
Tin & Twine
You are engaged, let the planning begin! In our experience, most people have a great support system when it comes to planning their wedding. Friends and family give you advice, send you recommendations and even offer to help. Others might have no clue where to start! We are here to say that's ok, whether you fall in either group or somewhere in between, most wedding planners have packages geared toward the level of help and support you might need. We broke it down by various couple categories and matched with a typical planning package you'll need according to your level of involvement in the process.
The DIY Couple
You are designing, planning and creating a lot of elements yourself. You've already booked most of your vendors, but now you are wondering who is going to direct everyone and make sure my vision comes to life?
Recommendation - Day of /Month of Wedding Coordinator
Why? Because who else is going to take a final expert look at all your rental orders, vendors, and set up your perfect big day? Day of Coordinators typically run your rehearsal, help with timeline creation and set/break down of all the decor. Let yourself, your friends and family enjoy the day by not worrying about wedding day logistics! Hire someone who has the experience to bring it all together. Not only will you enjoy your day ten times more but if any issues arise an experienced planner is prepared to handle without you or your guests evening noticing!
The Almost There Couple
You've got the venue, some of your vendors and a general idea of how you want your big day to unfold. BUT, you need someone to help tie it all together. Take your vision and run with it, give you recommendations, negotiate and book your remaining vendors.
Recommendation - Partial planner or three-month planning service
All planners have different ways they work the partial or three-month service plan. We found bookending the three-month time frame by six-week increments worked best for our clients. At initial booking we work the first six weeks to secure your remaining vendors, answer any of your questions, concerns and help map out your big day. Then we come back in the six weeks before to finalize all your details.
You have NO idea where to start or have NO interest/time in planning a wedding. You need someone to walk you through the process from start to finish. You want someone to create a design and overall look and feel for your big day.
Recommendation - Full planning consultation
The planner is with you from day one. They help you find a venue, or if you have already chosen one, they will help with everything else. For example, they'll guide you on overall design, vendor selection, logistics, timeline and everything in between. They are there every step of the way.
One of the first things we do here at Tin and Twine is to schedule a call or in-person meeting. We ask you A LOT of questions from do you have a date and venue to what is the look and feel you want for your big day. Getting a sense for your style and wedding day needs helps us make a recommendation on what wedding package works best for you. Making sure you feel supported and guided through the process is our number one goal. It's a big year with lots of moving parts which can be overwhelming to most. Wedding planners can ease that stress and make your wedding experience more enjoyable.
Let us know if you have any questions or additional tips!
Until next time lovelies.
Tin & Twine
Choosing your venue can be a daunting task, it’s typically one of the higher priced items you'll book for your big day and also sets the tone for the rest of your wedding planning. Once you choose a venue, you now have a wedding date, yippee! You can start your vendor research and lock down the rest of the details. We put together our top 5 things to think about when choosing your wedding venue.
First and foremost set a budget and know what the max amount you can spend on your wedding. It’s important to know your max number, so you will be able to carve out certain portions of the budget to various vendors. Keep in mind each venue is different. You might choose a place that includes rentals and catering, or they may require you to secure all your vendors.
We find that many of our couples have a hard time deciding where to narrow their venue search. Some want their wedding to be a destination for all their guests, while others wish to have theirs locally. Don’t be afraid to have multiple locations in mind, and we recommend going on a few venue tours to see what area you like best. For example, we recently had a bride and groom looking for venues near both their hometowns for the convenience of their parents as well as checking out places locally near them. Ultimately they found a perfect fit locally which has made it easy for consultations, walkthroughs etc.
Are you dreaming of having a sparkler send off or to throw confetti in the air? Check with your venue about their limitations. Some event spaces don't allow outside vendors, open flame, sparklers, loud music passed 10:00 pm, hard alcohol etc. If you want an open bar but the venue only allows beer & wine that might be hard no for you and your sweetie. Ask the venue manager for a list of their restrictions or a copy of their contract; this will help you decide which venue is right for you.
We know your big day should be all about you and don’t worry it really will be! But, thinking about your guest count and the types of guests you are going to invite can make a significant impact on what venue you hold your big day. Think logistics through like is there handicap or wheelchair access for your older guests. Will people have to do a lot of walking or walking on uneven ground? Being aware of your guest experience is an essential aspect of choosing your venue. How do you want your guests to feel or remember your wedding?
When visiting the venue look at the surrounding area. Are there hotels located within a short distance? Are there activities for your guest to do? Do you feel comfortable having your closest friends and family stay in the surrounding area? Are there restaurants and shops nearby for quick pickups?
Our biggest advice is to sit down with your significant other and possibly your parents (who might be helping pay for the big day), put together a list of must-have items for a venue. What’s most important and then you’ll be able to make a better decision on your site.
Let us know if you have any questions or found anything helpful when doing your venue search!
Until next time lovelies!
Tin & Twine
You've asked the main people in your life to stand by your side, now what do they wear!? Recently, a lot of our brides have been asking where to find the best bridal party attire and how to choose!?
So, we've rounded up our current favorite dresses and where to find them. We also have three easy steps to help point you in the right direction in choosing what your bridal wears on your big day.
Think through the following three questions and then start your search.
Style of your wedding
Have you decided on an overall theme or style for your wedding? Are you going for a glam, boho, traditional, rustic, modern or vintage look and feel? Once you choose the general direction for your design, it will be easier to pick the look of what dresses your bridesmaids wear.
What time of year are you holding your wedding? Is it indoor or outdoor? For example, if you have an outdoor fall wedding and you know it will be on the chillier side choose a long sleeve or maxi dress. Is it in the dead of the summer heat? Choose a lightweight, knee length and sleeveless dress.
Once you've decided on your wedding style, you'll need to pick a wedding color palette. This can be as easy as picking your favorite colors or choosing a palette that matches the time of year you are getting hitched.
If your wedding is in the spring, you could choose a light pastel palette of blush, cream and green. Having a fall wedding? Yellows, browns and burgundy pair well with the turning leaves at your venue.
We recommend starting a Pinterest board of all the wedding ideas you love. After a week or two of perusing ideas and saving your favorites do you see a trend or pattern? Are there a lot of the same colors and styles?
Think about your girl squads body type. We are betting they each come in there own beautiful, unique shape and size. Try to pick a dress that would be flattering and comfortable for your gal pals.
One easy way to make sure your besties feel their best is to let them pick out their own dress as long as it's in line with your style and color palette. We've had brides tell their girls to pick a grey maxi dress, and each girl gets to choose a dress that flatters her body. Letting them choose their own dress also allows them to watch that price tag. Let's face it our bank accounts tend to take a bit of a hit when we are a bridesmaid, but we do it because we love our bride and couldn't imagine not being by her side!
We have all the feels when it comes to these dresses, and we know they'd be beautiful on just about any wedding party.
Dusty Blue - BHLDN
Logan Velvet - BHLDN
Ginger Convertible Dress - BHLDN
Mariah Wrap Dress - Show Me Your MuMu
Godshaw Goddess Gown - Show Me Your MuMu
Navy Blue Maxi - LuLu's
Heavenly Hues Maxi - LuLu's
TFNC Pleated Midi - ASOS
Midi Dress with Lace Sleeves - ASOS
We'd love to hear from you! What are your plans to dress your bridal party?
Until next time loves!
Tin & Twine
Today we were featured on one of our favorite websites. To see all the details head on over to The Wandering Photographer.
We are so excited for all our events and shoots in 2018. We couldn't have asked for a better way to kick off the year. Collaborating with other creatives is one of our all time favorite things and we hope that this new year brings even more talented vendors and friends into our lives. Cheers to making this year count, setting even bigger goals and taking chances!
Photography by Vanessa Lynne Photography
Planning & Styling | Shannon McAlister of Tin & Twine Events
Florals | Sweet Lilacs Studio (red bouquet) + Bloom That (green bouquet)
Bridal Boutique | The Bridal Vault
Gown Designer | Lillian West
Rentals | Shannon McAlister of Ritual Rentals
Tie | "Blueberry Bliss" by Dazi
Cake & Confections | 81 Bakery
Looking forward to sharing even more with all you this year!
Tin & Twine
With Thanksgiving just a day away we wanted to take a moment and share a few things that we are thankful for in 2017. This year in particular Tin and Twine has been given more opportunities to partner with amazing vendors who have become dear friends. We've received more customer referrals than any other avenue, and this is in large part from our vendors and close friends/family. These go such a long way, and we could not be more grateful for everyone's faith in our dream and abilities.
Our families are our biggest fans and promoters. They push us on a rough day to pick up and keep going. When we accomplish something great, they support us and celebrate with us. Without all our friends, family, vendors and supporters we would not be able to continue striving for our dream.
Today, we are extra thankful for our very first opportunity of getting published for a styled shoot. Head over to I Do Y'all to view our Barefoot Boho Vow shoot.
Photographer | Vanessa Lynne Photography
Venue | The Willow Ballroom
Location | Hood, California
Planning | Tin and Twine Events
Rentals | Tin Roof Farmhouse Vintage Rentals
Florals | Yay for Cake
What are you grateful for this year? Comment below, we'd love to hear from you! Enjoy your time with friends and family this holiday. Cherish the small moments, they go by fast.
Tin & Twine
At Tin and Twine, we LOVE weddings but throwing a baby shower for a mama-to-be brings us so much joy! We love celebrating new life and seeing how excited a new mom is about her growing family. Our dear friends Mallory and Lance are expecting their first son in January 2018, and we couldn't be more excited for them! They are going to make wonderful parents.
We chose to celebrate our little pumpkin with a rustic fall theme. All the signs and design work you will see are from our talented friendor Milkman Creations. Tin and Twine did the decor and styling; we now do rentals!
Such a fun day with friends and family! All of us can't wait to meet baby boy. Congratulations Mallory and Lance.
Tin & Twine
Last weekend I had the pleasure of organizing a 49th birthday in Tahoe. My client and I had so much fun planning we are already scheming our next event! For Andy's birthday party festivities we kicked off the weekend with a round of golf on Friday at Edgewood. Him and his closest friends had a blast playing 18 holes on this scenic course.
Saturday was the main event, his guests met at Lakeside Marina just a short walk from the strip and jump aboard the Rum Runner. The guests were then greeted by Round Hill Pine's signature cocktail the Pain Killer in Andy's Fur-ty Ninth branded cups.
This scenic venue is owned by the U.S Forest Service and is the best kept secret in Tahoe. The tent is closed off enough so you feel protected by weather but open enough that you can enjoy the views of the lake. We worked with Milkman Creations to create a brand and theme through out the event.
Andy's nick name was the Fur Man back in college, hence "Andy's Fur-ty Ninth". We incorporate this phrase into almost every element of the party. We used different times in Andy's life as a theme for each table.
"Young Fur Pup" - His younger years.
Punahou High - High school years
"Go Broncos" - Santa Clara University & lacrosse
"2534 Chestnut" - post college living in SF in the 90's
"International Man of Mystery" - World cup and travels
"Andy is Fore-tee Nine" - Golf Trips
The "Fur Gear" station was a huge hit with the guests.
BBQ by Blue Angel Cafe
Shake it Like a Polaroid Picture
Shot Ski & Boozy Pops
Sunsets & Sweet Dance Moves
We had so much fun planning this party! From start to finish it was great getting to know my client, his friends and have a great turn out for his event.
Shannon McAlister, traveler, crafter, maker, cook, planner and doer.